Gainzo is a clown. His face is painted white, concealing a very hideous face. He has small black beady eyes and a red ball of rubber for his nose. He has three large tufts of hair, each a different color: blue, green, and yellow. He wears striped rainbow robes and has comically large leather shoes that honk with every step he takes. Gainzo has the voice of someone who has been smoking for fifty years.
Gainzo’s history is almost completely unknown. He appears to originate from Yldeinstel and is very old. He has a magic mansion in Yldeinstel which does not appear to people who know of its existence, and can only be found when you need it least. Gainzo also has his own theme song. Anyone who hears Gainzo’s Song experiences a horrific pain followed by their face melting off. Gainzo has allegedly beaten Bee Satan in an unfair fight.
Gainzo is the first character introduced in Death Dungeon, in the short story "The Past Is Prologue." He appears to the Storyteller, a prisoner in some sort of massive prison complex, who views Gainzo as a warden. After causing the Storyteller to have an identity crisis, Gainzo shows him how to escape his cell. Gainzo asks him to share his campfire, but the Storyteller would rather return to the universe. Gainzo shows him that the universe has been destroyed, and the past is all that is left. The Storyteller chooses to share the fire with Gainzo and tell stories about their universe, which begins the Death Dungeon canon.
The Goblin King
Gainzo is an active narrator for the story of Glando and Socrates.
In ‘’Glando and Socrates’’, Socrates of Delveron constantly taunts Glando by calling him Gainzo. However, the real Gainzo appears later in the story. Socrates stabs him and revives him as a zombie thrall to make him fight the goblin king. However Gainzo is secretly neither dead nor a thrall, and he returns to his villanous abode after the two mortals destroy each other.
Because Gainzo is the narrator, and admits to embellishing the story, it is unknown if he was actually killed, or was present at all.
Gainzo's Day Off
See: "Gainzo's Day Off"
One day, in an unknown time, Gainzo takes a day off. He starts his day by playing Gainzo's Song at the mansion's grand piano, but becomes bored. When he stops playing, the Eldritch god begins to stir, so Gainzo recruits a squirrel to play the song in his place. He makes a quick trip to the Boxscape for a disguise, then steps out of the universe and ends up in Parada.
Eventually the Paradians recognize Gainzo, and taunt him over his inability to play the banjo. Determined to prove them wrong, Gainzo plays Gainzo's Song on a banjo. The crowd at first enjoys it, but soon everyone's face melts off from listening to the song. Gainzo returns home and wonders what adventure's he'll be up to the next day.
Gainzo is gruff and ocassionally cruel. He is friends with no one and a potential enemy to all. He is quick to anger and destroys his enemies with a horrible wrath, but is relatively docile otherwise. Gainzo loves boxes, and supposedly has a very favorite box. Gainzo is addicted to cigarettes, and becomes ornery when he doesn't have a fix.
Relationships With Others
- Squirrel- Gainzo and the squirrel have a rocky relationship, as Gainzo refuses to learn the squirrel's name and abuses the creature's charity.